Is My Girlfriend Using Me?

Is My Girlfriend Using Me?

I have a girlfriend who I have sex with once a month.  Every time we have sex she needs $100. She claims to be looking for a job, so she can stop asking me for money. I’m not sure if I should start another relationship without money being involved. I’m not sure if she is using me. She also promised a baby in the future.


  • You are right to be concerned.  Typically, sex in a relationship does not mean that money should be exchanged.  You should feel that something is not quite right.  Your instinct is to end the relationship and find a girlfriend who does not ask you for money after intercourse.
  • Trust your instincts.  If you feel that she is using you, she probably is.  Giving your partner money after sex is not normal.  If fact, such actions can be considered against the law in some situations.  Consider whether she wants to continue to be with you if you refuse to give her any more money.  You may decide that someone who wants payment for what should be an act of intimacy is not the right girlfriend for you.  You deserve to be happy and with someone who cares about you, not your money.  Think about taking some time to yourself to figure out whether you want to be with a person like this.
  • Also, consider why she would promise a baby in the future.  You may not want that kind of responsibility.  If you do not want the emotional and financial responsibility that comes with a baby, please make sure that you use birth control every time you have sex with your girlfriend.


  • What would your girlfriend do if you said you would no longer be giving her any money?
  • If one of your friends was in your situation, what would you advise they do?
  • If you look up the definition of prostitution, how similar would your situation be to this definition?
  • What are the pros and cons of you putting your relationship on hold for a while to think things over?